I was walking through the park while the sun was setting and the sun rays shone through the trees. While I was walking took off my shoes and continued walking on the soft green grass. The air smells like the countryside. The birds were singing a song it was beautiful. I saw a bento truck I had a couple of dollars left and I bought a bento box and it was like I never left Korea.
I like how you caught the readers attention in the first line.
ReplyDeleteI it reminded me of time with my dog died.
I think you should of explained where you are at the time.
The twist ending was very creative. It reminded me of your Korean obsession. Give it more of an intro so we know what it is about.
ReplyDeleteFrom Rosa and Caleb
omg shot ahaha
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ReplyDeletethis is good i like the first sentences. next please work on your sentences and punctuation.
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